We are fast approaching spring, the time of renewal and new beginnings. We begin to think about spring cleaning, getting rid of those things we no longer need and clearing out the clutter from within our homes. Spring is also the perfect time to do a little clearing out of our mental and emotional drawers. All those out dated and harmful beliefs and thought patterns that are limiting your life.
Some of you may say, what clutter? My mind, emotions and ego are clean as a whistle. I don’t have anything more to reflect on. I would beg to differ. Even those of us who are incredibly self-aware and work on their shadow selves can benefit from a regular declutter session. Once you dig into the root cause of your beliefs and thought patterns, you can then begin to heal and transform your mindset.
One of the biggest stumbling blocks we all face in this life is fear. Did you know that over 80 percent of human behavior is driven by fear? When we remove the fear; the fear that is the driving force behind our limiting thoughts and behaviors, we can then get to the true source needing healing. When you clear away the fog of fear, it helps you to see your life with a much more accurate lens.
Fear can present itself in many different ways, but the two main core fears we have as humans is the fear of not being good enough, and the fear that our life won’t be good enough. Some of these fears are planted into our subconscious as far back as our early childhood. No matter how wonderful your parents were, you still probably heard, “Don’t do that!” or “Don’t touch that!” These comments, as innocuous as they might seem, helped reinforce that you needed to be different, that you weren’t good enough. Your Ego then perpetuates that messaging in a feeble attempt at keeping you ‘safe’, no matter how ridiculous the premise might seem to you in adulthood.
Some ways you can tell if you’re living in a fear based mindset are the following:
Taking things personally, when they really aren’t all that personal
Focused on yourself -- you seek validations. Getting approval from others for your actions instead of accepting who you are and owning that feeling.
The need to be perfect – if you have a perfectionist mind, you are living in fear of not being good enough and so are constantly trying to be perfect.
Constantly in a state of want – you consistently need more – more friends, more money, more love. You live in a constant state of lack or scarcity.
You don’t aim too high – your goals are easily achieved, you stay out of the spotlight and under the radar.
You perceive everything as win/lose or better than/less than – You see individuals as ‘different’ than you, and constantly a peg higher, or lower than you. Never equal.
You experience negative emotions all the time – Fear is the basis for jealousy, anger, guilt and hatred.
You live a life behind a mask, afraid to show the world who you truly are.
Using these fears as a foundation, we create stories that we tell ourselves. These stories, in theory, are our Ego's way of trying to protect us. If we figure out the old outdated stories we’re telling ourselves, we can then rewrite it to better suit our adult selves. We tell ourselves stories about wealth, success, employment, love, and parenting, just to name a few. The key is to dig down into where the messaging came from, and rewrite the story in a more positive way.
If your parents were always talking about money, having problems keeping it, not wanting to be greedy, or that they thought being rich was a sin, then maybe you’re problem with money stems from the story you’re telling yourself about not being worthy to have wealth. If you examine the areas in your life that you are consistently self-sabotaging, look deep inside to see what story you’re telling yourself? What messages, thoughts, and beliefs are you continually telling yourself, keeping you stuck on an endless loop of disappointment?
My challenge to you is while you’re spring cleaning your home, you also spend some time looking at the stories you’re telling yourself and how you can positively rewrite them to have a lasting impact on your life.
If you’d like to discover more ways to overcome your negative thoughts, emotions and belief systems, I am hosting a workshop on March 7th where we will delve into various exercises to help you clear out your mental, emotional and Ego centric clutter.
For more details, click on the link for: Clearing out your Emotional and Mental Closet – March 7th at 6:30 PM at Discover Your Spiritual Gifts
Until next time,
Post originally written and published for the Discover Your Spiritual Gifts Blog - Feb 2019